Pulling the Reins: On Myself?
Written by Michele T on October 15, 2008 – 8:06 pm -Posted Wednesday, October 15, 2008
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I really do feel this way, like I’m pulling the reins on myself. I know I’m holding myself back. I’m capable of accomplishing so much more than I do. I was born to write, to blog, to succeed as a writer. I know that. It’s hard to be confident in that sometimes, though. For me at least. How about you? Do you feel this way? Do you feel like you’re holding yourself back, like you’re your own worst critic?
As writers, we are on the silent side of the screen. We can respond to e-mails quietly. If we need to, we have the option to let an e-mail sit before we respond. Maybe we need to gain our composure if we’re angry or have some other strong emotion to the author of the e-mail. Or maybe we just need time to think of the best words to reply with. Either way, we’re safe. E-mail is a nice, quiet way to communicate – with words, which we’re comfortable with.
I’ve come across numerous blogs where writers are sharing these exact thoughts. Jennifer, at Catalyst Blogger, shared similar feelings in her post The Freelancer’s Guide to Giving Good Phone. It’s an older post of hers but it’s really stuck with me. I was surprised when she fessed up with her readers that she really isn’t fond of talking with clients on the phone. I guess I shouldn’t have been. So many of us writers are perfectly ok with peace and quiet (the ones I know anyway).
Do you feel like you’re pulling the reins on yourself? Are you holding yourself back? Are you still fantasizing about seeing your name in that dream magazine, but are too petrified to pick up the phone and call the editor? Could your business grow if you got out of your comfort zone? I’m sure it could. I know (with all my heart) that I would have those big dream credits tucked sweetly in my portfolio – if only I’d get up, climb out on that limb, and reach for the sky. After all, the sky is the limit. Right?
“But, it’s so cozy where I am, Michele.” You argue. And, you’re so very right! When you get comfy in any area of your life, it’s hard to do something different and get used to something totally new and there are some folks in the world who are absolutely scared stiff of the unknown. They have a “what if” syndrome. I’m guilty of that one myself. “What if” I call the editor and they never answer an e-mail from me in the future because they remember my name as the kook with the zealous voice who interrupted their lunch? “What if” I don’t succeed as soon as I’d hoped if I venture out into new writing waters? We can drive ourselves bonkers with all the “what if” questions.
Life is full of uncertainties, of mishaps and dangers and surprises we aren’t expecting. They’re around almost every corner. We have to learn to accept them, learn from them, grow from them, WRITE ABOUT THEM, and be all the wiser from them in the end. It isn’t easy, I know. But if we’ll stop pulling the reins on ourselves, we won’t have to sit and watch our writing come to a halt. We need to make sales, people! We need to move to the next level in our writing careers!
Are you ready to let go of those reins? Are you with me? What’s the first thing you’re going to do so you’ll be running free like the wild stallions? Will you call that editor? Pick up the phone and talk business with a client (maybe even ask them for a raise)? What is the first thing I’m going to do? Oh, I’m letting go. I’m writing this post from a coffee shop. How’s that letting go? I’m a hermit (big time)!! It’s a major breakthrough when I venture out into the public.
Big ole dream clips, here I come!!!!
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Here’s to writing (freely!) the cyber highway!!
Tags: encouragement, Inspiration, reins, Writing
Posted in Inspiration, Michele's Life, Writing, Writing Thoughts, Writing Wisdom | 19 Comments »
October 16th, 2008 at 4:20 am
Congratulations on your writing while enjoying a cup-a-joe, Michele. I do know that this is an accomplishment for you, and am very proud.
You are speaking to me with this post. I hold myself back on so many levels.
I’m going to take a step, and I will let you know what that is when I give it some thought.
Grandys last blog post..Because we have to be told?
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October 16th, 2008 at 5:26 am
This is so true! We hold ourselves back sometimes, huh? It’s easy to fall into a comfort zone and a routine when the reality is that there is so much more out there for us! Thanks for the reminder.
Katherines last blog post..Marketing Your Business – Our Top Eight Tips
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October 16th, 2008 at 6:18 am
Congratulations on stepping out of your comfort zone, Michele.
Today I took a job even though I just wanted to hibernate. I forced myself to make the call, set the time, go out and do the job, and I feel much better for the $30 in my pocket thanks to it.
Now, it’s time to take another step.
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October 16th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Hey There!
Great advice in this post. Keep stepping out of the comfort zone, Michele, and keep in touch! Miss you!
Encouraging Hugs,
Renie
Renie Burghardts last blog post..Ruby Tuesday
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October 16th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Good on you, Michele!
You’ve identified the biggest, most common barrier to our success – ourselves. I used to struggle with the “what if I’m not good enough?” crap until I changed the perspective. This is a job. It’s a business. It’s not me hanging my soul out for the world to spit on. It’s me working to support my kids and doing it at a job I happen to love.
Try that.
)
Loris last blog post..Standing Up for Your Business
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October 16th, 2008 at 10:42 pm
““What if” I call the editor and they never answer an e-mail from me in the future because they remember my name as the kook with the zealous voice who interrupted their lunch?”
And what if you do nothing? It would be far better to fail permanently from trying, then to never try and never know.
Further, I doubt the editor would be upset. If you do this, so have many more. He knows the territory he or she is in. You would be one of many to call, or you would be one that never did.
Bamboo Forests last blog post..Cultivating Awareness: The Sure Path to Reaching The Top
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October 17th, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Hey, it’s not easy pushing ourselves out of our respective comfort zones. I know that even heading down to a coffee shop to write for the day can take a lot of effort and determination. But as writers, pushing past our own limits is instrumental. Good job Michele!
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October 17th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Ah, Grandy! So glad you’re here.
Thanks! It was really different – but totally inspiring! The little tables/coffee/laptops don’t work too well with a clutzy gal like me, though. LOL
We do tend to hold ourselves back, don’t we?! We’re going to have to stop doing that, eh?
I’m so glad the words from my heart spoke to you – and I can’t wait to find out what step(s) you’ve taken!
*smiles and big ole get well hugs*
Michele
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October 17th, 2008 at 10:46 pm
You’re most welcome for the reminder, Katherine! I’ve had this post sitting in drafts for a while now and finally the inspiration hit me to finish it.
Yes, it’s soooooooo easy to snuggle into a comfort zone and stay there. Note to self: stop doing that!
There is so much out there for us – and I intend to find it and gobble it up!
*smiles*
Michele
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October 20th, 2008 at 2:45 pm
Great post! I definitely would love to see my name printed in a national publication. I’ve brainstormed a lot of great (original) ideas, that I think would interest readers. Now, I just have to find (or rather make) the time to writer queries and pitch my ideas.
Valencias last blog post..Improving Alertness and Energy with Exercise
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October 22nd, 2008 at 4:28 pm
Michele, in answer to your question “Yes!” It is so easy to encourage others and sometimes difficult to implement that advice – posts like this help! I have been guilty of doing things for clients and watching it succeed but not doing it for myself. Your post encourages me to quit stalling already and do it! I know your dreams will come true and I look forward to reading and celebrating right here.
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October 23rd, 2008 at 1:59 am
Michele, stepping outside the box is the hardest thing on that road to success! We all struggle with that every day.
Your post was a great reminder that we all need to let go and let our dreams have free rein!
Beccas last blog post..Everybody Write!
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October 24th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Michele,
I was reading a few things on LinkedIn this AM, when I realized I hadn’t checked your blog in some time. When I clicked on the link to your website, I was excited to see your portal that links to your portfolio, blog, website, etc. I really liked it!! Very professional and links all of your work together! Way to go…as far as the topic of your post…I’m surprised you don’t have a giant picture of my face smack in the middle of it. I am my own worst enemy. I’ve taken a few leaps, but not like I should. It’s that little voice in my head that says, “Who do you think you are, wanting to write an article for ‘Vanity Fair’? Hahahahaha. Go do a few more SEO articles for $10 a pop. Sheesh.” I know I shouldn’t listen, but I do. And for those of you concerned about voices in my head, you know you hear them too!
Well, not my voices…that would be crazy.
Kathy Scovills last blog post..‘Dark Knight’ Rerelease Could Result in Box Office and Oscar Gold
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October 26th, 2008 at 5:56 pm
Thanks, Valencia!
Oh, the glossy mags are calling, aren’t they?! Here’s to making the time to pitch and to getting in!
*smiles*
Michele
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October 26th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Hey there, Karen!
I’m so glad my post helped you. It is so easy to get caught up in doing so much for others that we almost forget about succeeding ourselves, isn’t it?
What a blessing that I encouraged you! That’s my greatest heart’s desire… to be an encouragement and inspiration to my readers. Yay for accomplishing that!
I know my dreams will come true, too. It’s just that I’m a gal of little patience and always want stuff YESTERDAY!
*smiles*
Michele
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October 26th, 2008 at 6:09 pm
Becca,
It is the hardest thing to do, isn’t it?! I’m thankful that you enjoyed my post and that it reminded you to let go and give your dreams free rein!
I am sure you don’t realize what an amazingly talented writer you are. Seriously!
*smiles*
Michele
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October 26th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
Kathy,
You’re a hoot! I really enjoyed reading this comment of yours. I’m glad you like my website! I have received more compliments on it then I’ll ever be able to count! I did have the vision in my head, but Goofy Girl Designs used her techy talents to make it a reality.
Way to go…as far as the topic of your post…I’m surprised you don’t have a giant picture of my face smack in the middle of it.
Love that! Like I said… you’re a hoot! hehehe
Seriously, though, it is so hard to find the courage to query those big markets. It’s not that we aren’t talented enough, ya know. We may not be perfect, but we’re definitely capable of pulling of an amazing article – or tons!
And for those of you concerned about voices in my head, you know you hear them too!
Well, not my voices…that would be crazy.
*laughs hysterically ’till side hurts*
*smiles*
Michele
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November 4th, 2008 at 2:54 am
Michele,
This is so true! So often, we hold ourselves back, while we’re busy making excuses — and calling them reasons — why we can’t get ahead.
Thanks for exploding some of the myths of the can’t-get-ahead mentality and cheering us on to get out there and do whatever it takes to find success! Sometimes, we have to be willing to let go of those reins take a risk–to refuse to give in to fear or timidity. When we do, often we find that letting go of the familiar and embracing something new and exciting wasn’t as bad as we thought it would be, and good things come our way.
Thanks for encouraging us to run with the stallions!
Wonderful post!
Jeanne
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February 8th, 2009 at 10:45 pm
[...] I read her story, I’ve been reflecting on my own. I’ve mentioned before I need to stop pulling the reins on myself so I can go to the next level in my freelance writing business. So, why do I feel I’m still [...]