By

Michele L. Tune

Photo Credit: albertawoodrow

It brings so many different feelings to the table, yet so many people insist on being “the R word”.

For example, here’s a list of a few emotions that result when in the midst of “the R word:”

1. Frustration
2. Hurt feelings
3. Anger
4. Rage
5. Hard feelings
6. Stress
7. Headaches
8. Miscommunication
9. Resentment
10. Lost friendship(s)
11. Lost freelance writing opportunities
12. Editors that have no desire to work with you
13. A bad reputation

Ok, I know you’re dying to know what “the R word” is…. It … is… (drum roll)….

RUDE

I trotted across the cyber highway to the free dictionary, and here’s what “the R word” actually means:

• lacking in refinement or grace
• lacking civility or good manners

Which reminded me of an article Amy Derby had published in Writing for Dollars newsletter a while back–Manners Matter for Freelance Writers. In this article, Amy shares her feelings and opinions and even reactions to how she handles RUDE freelance writer’s submissions. It’s amazing the audacity writers have had in their first emails to her!

Please tell me you would never approach an editor with a haughty attitude, like you’re the best writer in the world that doesn’t have time to wait a few weeks (like the rest of us) for a reply from a busy editor.

It just seems everywhere we look, listen, or turn these days, rudeness is overwhelming. From road rage, to men knocking women silly as they shove past them in their attempt to barge through the door first, its like chivalry is forever lost. Where are the courteous gentlemen anyways?

Honestly, I was clueless as to what I was going to write about for Writing the Cyber Highway readers. A friend of mine actually inspired this post. I shared my “blank page frustrations” with her today via email. I also shared a few other things, especially about an event that happened yesterday where the person just showed NO common courtesy, whatsoever.

In her reply, my friend spilled the beans about a few of her experiences with rude customers. She runs a family business, and often receives phone calls getting all the blame for things the customers themselves have failed to do or take note of. She suggested I discuss rude things that have happened to me, things I’d never myself do–like making someone wait all day and never showing up!

Blogger/writer friends, I do hope you don’t present yourself (online or off) in a rude manner. What does it accomplish? There are writers that have missed the awesome opportunity to work with Amy Derby simply because they forgot their manners, for whatever reason.

Friendships are ruined, feelings are hurt, and bad first impressions (which can never be recreated) are etched in stone. I just personally think that “the R word” should never raise its ugly head, especially when approaching an editor, or anyone, for the first time.

Even after you’ve known someone for a long while, you don’t have to be rude. EVEN if they are rude to us–EVEN if they mistreat us, we don’t have to “stoop” to that level and join them, right?

I truly believe with all my heart one of the biggest reasons I’m finding more and more writing success, is the fact that I’m nice. I’ve even had editors reply in an e-mail that I’m the nicest person they’ve “talked to” all day!

Kindness, courtesy, respect, genuine concern, sweetness, and patience goes a long way, you all. I think employers, editors, publishers, and mankind in general, are starving for a wholesome, considerate person to pass through their day.

Make a great first impression, and you may just hang around to become a full-time writer! Stand tall, smile, dig deep, and find the goodness that surely lays within each of our hearts–and run from “the R word” as you write the cyber highway (with extra kindness and a smile!)….

By

Michele L. Tune

Photo Credit: chiara_gianna

Ring a bell? Remember the old adage, Don’t count your chickens, before they are hatched? My Grandmother use to warn me of this all the time. Funny how grandmothers are never wrong.

I’ve learned this lesson (again) the hard way.

Let me explain: A while back, I received an acceptance letter from the editor of an anthology. It had been decided that my story would be included. I received, read, signed, and returned my contract. All was well–or so I thought. Months went by and I grew more and more excited about the thought of my special memory being published in this nostalgic anthology. I even told people my story would be included in this upcoming anthology!

Last night, I received a phone call from the editor. I thought it strange that an editor would call at night, but anxiously answered to find out the reason.

“Hello,” I answered.

“I need to speak to Michele Tune.” She said.

“This is she,” I replied.

“Oh, I’ll just go ahead and tell you,” She sighed. “It’s with a heavy heart, I must tell you that your story has been cut from the book.”

“Oh, ok.” I said, trying not to sound “sad”.

She explained in detail: They received so many submissions relating to the same theme, the publisher/editors decided to change the whole focus of the book to that angle, which meant 15 of the stories (although the editor assured me they were 15 very well written stories) had to be cut because they no longer “fit the needs of the book”.

This editor felt so bad. She told me she just felt terrible.

Of course, I told her it was fine (and, it is) because I completely understand. The theme of the book changed, with good cause. And, some of the stories no longer worked, and mine was one of them.

I’ve said all that to say this (listen up blogger/writer friends: Things like this happen. It’s sad, sometimes heart-breaking, but it happens. This is where a true writer “shines”.

It’s at times like these, a tender-hearted writer will push away from pen and paper (or in our day, keyboard), and let their dreams of being a successful writer fade into the far distance.

Am I sad? Yes. Who wouldn’t be? I see no point in telling a lie, when the fact is I’m really disappointed! Will I let this little bump in the road slow me down on my way to my dreams? No! I’ve learned that my greatest disappointments and rejections, come right before the best news I’ve yet to receive!

To top that off, after I sat down at my computer to try and decide which market I would send my story to next (because that’s what I do), I noticed an email from another editor. A big, fat rejection was in that email. There again, I began to toss that article around in my head and ponder the next market I would submit it to.

We are winners, either way. We will make it, but only if we persist and take the bad with the good.

Keep in mind that book authors receive 50 + rejections from publishers before their book manuscripts are accepted a lot of times. Could you keep submitting that manuscript?

It’s the faithful, dedicated, ever-learning, persistent writers who make it in this world. I’m going to be one of them, are you?

I have a lot of “eggs” out there. I continuously submit articles, inspirational stories, and query different publications. I receive a lot of rejections, but I’m also really beginning to receive a lot of acceptance e-mails “Good News from so and so”, etc. I love emails with”Good news” in the subject line!

I am very determined, so I will accept the reality that my story had to be cut, as well as the other rejection I received last night, and I’ll move on. That’s the advice I give, because that’s what I do on any given day.

Definitely follow grandma’s advice: Don’t count your chickens before they’ve hatched! (Our grandmothers knew what they were talking about.) When you receive rejection letters/emails or even find out your story/article has been cut, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and continue writing the cyber highway!

By

Michele L. Tune

Photo Credit: RoseViolet333

I’m anxious to share my writing news: This week has been a great week! I’ve made some sales, spoken to nice editors (via e-mail and telephone), and *fingers crossed* am almost certain that I have managed to secure an ongoing writing gig (I’ll be using a pseudonym for this one, as I sometimes do)!

An essay I’ve sold to a magazine may end up in the online version only, or the print magazine–the editor isn’t sure yet. So, I’ll share that information when I find out more. I love to write and sell essays, so it’s always a joy when these opportunities arise.

Another sale I made was to Common Ties. I sold a quickie in the epiphany category, so that was nice! If all goes as planned, I’ll be able to post the link to my quickie, October 15th.

Overall, I’m pleased with my writing progress. I’m learning a lot as I go, and I definitely want to continue to learn and hone my craft. I never want to think my writing is perfect (it’s far from it)!

I’m thrilled that I get to write and sell my words, my thoughts, my expressions…. I can’t imagine NOT . It’s just who I am. I live and breathe and dream and aspire and exist–to write.

Not everyone understands the incessant need a writer feels to write, the burning inspiration we must “splash” onto our pages. Whether it’s a novel, short story, essay, poem, informational article, or even just a diary or blog, I think only we writers understand that passion.

Family and/or friends almost make us feel like our writing is senseless, like it isn’t going anywhere, like we should do something “worthwhile”, like our writing just doesn’t matter. What they don’t understand is that if we didn’t write, we would wither away, shrivel up, become gray and part of us would just die.

So, we write… We continue to play the waiting game (after a while, it’s second nature), and we write and wait. The waiting pays off, though!

If you’re reading this, and you’re discouraged about your writing dreams coming true, pick yourself up and persevere. Keep writing, keep submitting, keep believing, and keep waiting.

Patience is a virtue (I believe) all successful writers possess. Dig deep and find patience. It’s in there!

And, good luck writing the cyber highway!